Destined only to be studied by those with an interest in big-budget commercial failures, Jonah Hex is the first genuine Hollywood flop of 2010: a comic book translation that fails on practically every level.
It's clear from the outset that something is amiss: the murky voice-over, the jarring editing and the astonishingly intrusive 80s-style guitar soundtrack suggest that a much longer film originally existed, and we are watching the pared down remains of a grandiose project that has gone spectacularly wrong.
The voice-over belongs to Josh Brolin, who plays the title character: a maverick Confederate soldier in 1876 America, who is disfigured and left with a gaping hole in his face by the evil Turnbull (John Malkovich). In a story that mixes fantasy, the western and the thriller it transpires that Turnbull is in possession of a prototype nuclear bomb and has - for uncertain reasons - designs on blowing up his country. Hex is the only man who can stop him, and he also has the ability to raise the dead and find information from them.
It's confusing, over-the-top, dark and despite its short running time, very boring. There are a lot of good actors wasted here: Brolin grunts, Malkovich chews, and Michael Fassbender fiddle-dee-dees his way through proceedings as Malkovich's Irish sidekick. Megan Fox is thoroughly miscast as a wordly-wise prostitute, and Hex's love interest.
It's not completely dissimilar from the Will Smith misstep Wild Wild West, with its concoction of new-fangled weapons and the manner in which it plays around with time. While that was loud and bombastic, this is a film that is unsure of itself, which is not surprising given that it looks as though it was hacked to pieces in the editing room. With a reported $50m budget, the film has taken less than 10% of that at the American box office, and will only be remembered as one of 2010's big cinematic mistakes.
Paul Hurley
