On sale: Now
0-60mph: 11.5 seconds; top speed 111mph
Average fuel: 37 mpg
Standard equipment: on demand 4WD, seven seats, full leather, 18-inch alloy wheels, 8 speaker CD system with 6 CD autochanger, hill descent control, front fogs, cooled glovebox, glass flip-up tailgate window, twin exhausts, steering-set audio controls, cruise control, remote central locking, electronic stability control, driver, passenger and side airbags, power windows, auto headlights, rain-sensing wipers, trip computer, self-levelling suspension.
Tiscali verdict: 5/10 Impressive ingredients cooked cooked with care, but served up with a lack of finesse.
You'd be hard pushed to haggle a Chevrolet salesman over one of these. Though the price is hardly rock-bottom, it's hard to find a hole in the spec menu for the Captiva. In fact, it'd be quicker to ask what it hasn't got (a sunroof and sat nav, if you're asking).
Yet despite being so prodigiously endowed and being built with tangibly good results, there's something lacking in the immediate moments with the Captiva. What can it be? Is it the badging, perhaps? Two crude gold crosses are slapped on the front and back and look like some sort of heavy-metal tribute from a six former's art and design class. They really are nasty.
Beyond that, I guess it looks really dull, though you might say that about most of the rivals. SUV ownership, unless you bag a Freelander, is hardly a ticket to the local automotive beauty pageant.
Okay, so we'll forgive the me-too looks and the only visual distinction being the dreadful oversized badging, what else? Well, the image is a bit slippery but perhaps that's because of this model's global provenance. In a nutshell, it's got styling input from Sao Paulo, Melbourne, Korea and Germany, so it's not surprising that the results, like a chicken tikka Hawaiian Thai pizza (with kangaroo sausages) are a bit of a mish-mash. The reason for this combination of influences is that the Captiva was chiefly conceived in South Korea by GM Daewoo (and hence the sister in the pea pod is the new Vauxhall Antara) but the designers decided to have a good old gander around the international rivals for styling cues.
On the positive side, the results are hard to pull apart. The dashboard styling is solid and neatly executed with no cheap plastics or wobbly bits. In fact the only noises from my tester in transit stemmed from the odd creak from the leather upholstery.
Accommodation is surprisingly generous despite the relatively trim exterior dimensions: the rear seats have ample leg and head room and the 60-40 split design is "actioned" by one easy lever. The seat backs tilt back, too...
There's only a small load area when the rear-most pair of seats are up and running and you then have an issue in where to stash the luggage cover, but the high load floor is a good bonus and the separate glass section of the tailgate makes quick shopping drops easy.
This Italian-built diesel is a 150bhp design. It's clattery first thing, but soon settles down, though noise insulation could be better - particularly on the motorway, where fifth gear feels a little tight and the desire for a taller, quieter cog becomes a touch irritating.
Back in the country, the drive system works in front-wheel drive only for most of the time, but a muddy or steep track will trigger a redistribution of grip, sending traction to the rear axle. It's clearly a capable machine, though if you press on on a country road you'll soon be aware that it's no driver's car - too much body roll rules that out. Drive like a semi-comatose Yank and it will feel like an upmarket sofa: you get the feeling that our dear cousins had more than their say in this respect.
Oh dear, the Captiva doesn't exactly hit the final leg of the test route with a spring in its step. Against a proper 4x4 SUV like the Freelander, it represents strong value for money, but its image is bland and the car has no lasting charm. On the plus side though, it's roomy and well-built. I guess if you want SUV discretion bordering on anonymity, it ticks the box confidently.
