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Sex With My Sister - Agony Aunt

Ask Anne

Dear Anne

I'm 15. My sister and I were at home alone while Mum and Dad were on holiday. We started talking about sex. One thing led to another and we started to experiment with each other. We had full sex. It only happened the once but I think I ejaculated inside her and I'm worried that she is pregnant. What should I do? I am so worried that Mum and Dad will find out. Ralph

Dear Ralph

Thank you for your letter. It may sound unkind but I'm glad you're worried. Apart from anything else it shows you're aware you've done something wrong. However old your sister is, you and she shouldn't be having sex. It's incest. If you and she were to have a child together, the close blood relationship between you means you stand a very high chance of creating a baby who is unhealthy either physically or mentally. Moreover, most people would be utterly horrified if they found out that a brother and sister were the baby's parents. Also if you're the older, you should be responsible for her, and vice versa, not putting her into situations of what is probably child abuse since you at least are only 15.

The first thing is for your sister to seek professional advice. She can contact the Brook Advisory Centre on 0800 0185023 and talk to them in confidence. They will be able to help her make good, self-supportive decisions. This may, of course, include whether to have an abortion. If this is necessary, it's important that it be carried out sooner rather than later. They can also tell her how best to approach your parents, so please urge her to contact them as soon as possible.

Assuming she's not pregnant, you and she now have choices. I hope you will both understand that you were curious about sex and decided to follow that curiosity through, but more than that, I hope you and she will agree that you will never, ever, put yourselves in a situation where you might be tempted to do anything sexual with each other again. You could also decide what you would gain by telling your parents, and therefore whether you will inform them. If you need to talk to someone about it yourself, the Brook Advisory would be there for you too. They will be helpful rather than judgmental, and you might feel better for talking it through with someone responsible but confidential.

I hope all goes well with your sister, and that both of you have learned from this that sex between you is not acceptable. Good luck. Back to Ask Anne

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